January - Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.
February - Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels....."duh".....bottles won't fit in typewriter!!!
March - Got excited.....finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months.....box said "2-4 years!"
April - Trapped on escalator for hours.....power went out!!!
May - Tried to make Kool-Aid.....8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets!!!
June - Tried to go water skiing.....couldn't find a lake with a slope.
July - Lost breast stroke swimming competition.....learned later, other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!!!
August - Got locked out of car in rain storm.....car swamped, because top was down.
September - The capital of California is "C".....isn't it???
October - Hate M & M's.....they are so hard to peel.
November - Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days.....instructions said 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108!!!
December - Couldn't call 911....."duh".....there's no "eleven" button on the phone!!!
What a year!!
hahaha, awesome
ReplyDeletethese are actually pretty funny, I haven't heard a lot of them
ReplyDeleteyeah i laughed ;p
ReplyDeletelol, nice jokes.
ReplyDeleteamazing, I didn't know that
ReplyDeletehahaha
ReplyDeletehahaha blondie girls must hate you, man XD
ReplyDeletehaha some new ones I haven't read before.
ReplyDeletetried to alphabetize skittles.
ReplyDeleteM&M's lol :D
ReplyDeletethey get better everytime *busts a gut*
ReplyDelete